5 Ways to Lively Self-Esteem

Do you sometimes feel insecure or doubt your abilities? The feeling of not being completely safe on your own foundation, many know. A strong self-confidence is often sold as the key to a successful life, but actually it is something much softer: It is the confidence that you will get through the day well with yourself, no matter what. It is not about being error-free, but about being a good companion or companion to yourself.

Looking at the inner comments

Our thoughts are often like a radio running in the background. If this channel is constantly criticizing, it will be hard to feel safe. It is not a question of simply replacing negative thoughts with positive slogans. Rather, it helps to recognize the critical voice for what it is: an old protective mechanism. Try to counter these comments with a benevolent look. A gratitude journal can help you gently focus on what is already there, rather than just what is supposedly missing.

Own standards instead of external expectations

We often feel insecure because we try to achieve goals that are not our own. True self-confidence grows in small, honest steps. Set goals that feel right for you, not your environment. When you celebrate a success, it’s not about the performance itself, it’s about the experience: I set out to do something and I went for myself. Every little step counts.

Honoring so-called mistakes as part of history

In a world of perfection, mistakes often seem like a blemish. But what we call "mistakes" is usually a question of zeitgeist or perspective. What is a mistake for one can be a hidden strength for the other. Systemically, these moments are valuable information. A so-called error only shows you where a limit lies or where a path does not continue. Instead of judging yourself for failing, you may ask yourself: What have I learned here about myself and my needs? Those who allow themselves mistakes take the pressure to be constantly superhuman.

Inhabiting their own trenches

Often we focus so much on eradicating our weaknesses that we forget to appreciate our very substance. Inhabiting one’s own trenches means also establishing oneself in the depths, the fractures and the uneven places of one’s own biography. Where it is not smoothly polished, often lie the strongest roots. What is easy for you? What are you secretly proud of? Allow yourself to appreciate these pages in yourself. Trying new things helps to discover facets in your trenches that were hidden until now.

Elective relations and strengthening spaces

Your social environment acts as a resonance body for your self-image. There are people in whose presence we shrink, and those in whom we feel far and secure. Pay attention to who is doing you good and who is supporting you in your growth. A mentor or appreciative network can be an anchor. It is not a sign of weakness to seek support, but a sign of self-care.

One way, not a goal

Self-confidence is not a state you reach once and then possess forever. It is a living process. Sometimes we feel safe, sometimes shaky. Both can be. If you feel that the uncertainty is too deep or old experiences block you, a therapeutic accompaniment can help you understand the roots of these feelings. In practice at Marienplatz we support you in taking your very own coherent place in life.

You are the base

In the end, it’s not about creating a better version of yourself. It’s about liking the person you already are more again. With all corners, edges and uncertainties. This is where real self-confidence begins.